What is Mediation?
Simply put, mediation utilizes a neutral third party to support individuals in coming to resolutions. The neutral third party supports positive, topic-driven discussion focused on transcending differences and reaching mutually agreeable solutions.
Aligned Mediation specifically support parties with minor children in the process of separation, dissolution/divorce, and ongoing (post decree) as life unfolds. We facilitate progressive discussions, working towards agreements and resolutions both parties can live into as the family moves forward.
The Big Three in Family Mediation:
- Parenting Time & Decision Making
- Division of Financial Assets and Debts
- Child Support & Maintenance or Spousal Support
Every situation is unique and each party is encouraged to bring forward what is important to them. It is not uncommon for even the most experienced communicators and parties on the best of terms to struggle through these important life conversations and decisions. We invite you to consider the use of a mediator.
What is the difference between Mediation and Litigation?
Family Mediation involves two parties sitting down to make agreements and find solutions regarding their shared interests around their separation. The mediator facilitates as a neutral third party, supporting the parties in unpacking and untangling their current life together, working towards agreements regarding how life may look as everyone moves forward.
Litigation naturally places parties on opposing sides, pitting them against one another.
“We know litigation is very hard on families, very hard on children, a waste of resources, a waste of assets, and it’s stressful. So, we always say it’s better if people can reach their own agreements.” – Judge Susan Tolbert
Details on mediation costs:
The mediated separation and divorce/dissolution process typically unfolds over multiple mediation sessions. Mediation sessions are typically 1 hour in length and most parties will take 3 to 5 sessions to reach their necessary agreements. The $3,000 flat mediation fee can be split evenly among the parties, may have an alternate percentage split, or may be entirely paid by one party. The fee can also be split into 3 monthly payments of $1,000 each.
Respecting that there are situations where the parties are unable to reach their own agreements, we encourage considering the strain litigation can put on families emotionally and financially, and that ultimately both parties may give up the final decision to a third party judge. As illustrated in the below triangle, the individual in the equation with the least amount of knowledge makes the decisions for the parties and their family.
Are attorneys involved in the Mediation process?
Attorneys can be utilized by either or both parties within the process, that said, it also is not uncommon for clients to forego attorneys entirely, and instead just utilize specialists (such as a tax professional) when and if needed along the way. The choice is always 100% yours.
If parties wish to utilize attorneys, fees may be reduced and limited by utilizing attorneys who offer “Limited Scope Representation”, also referred to as “unbundled” or “limited” services. Therefore, these attorneys are willing to offer support with designated legal services rather than their full divorce package. Limited Scope Representation may allow you to obtain the assistance you need from an attorney, while still keeping your legal expenses affordable.
Parties always have the legal right to utilize mediation to reach agreements and file their own dissolution without the use of attorneys anywhere in the process, this is called Pro Se (Latin meaning for one’s self).
The 3 Stages of Family Mediation
1. Mediated Separation
Couples often separate prior to the dissolution/divorce taking place, the earlier in the process that couples attend mediation, the more satisfied they report being with the process. At the time of separation there are many decisions to be made that mediators can help facilitate, though these are often short-term solutions and agreements they are often necessary in supporting parties and families through this transitional period and time. Common topics include living situation/housing during the transition, initial separating of financial accounts, financial support, and parenting time during the transition. Again, these are often short-term agreements, lasting only until final agreements are solidified through the dissolution/divorce process, that said, they are an imperative part of the transition that support an overall successful process.
As couples progress through the process they move forward with either a dissolution of marriage or a divorce.
2. Mediated Dissolution and Divorce
A dissolution of marriage is a procedure that is used when the parties are able to make decisions without court intervention. Through a dissolution of marriage parties may eliminate much of the divorce process and expense, additionally the majority opinion is that a dissolution of marriage, when possible, is far easier on families than a divorce. The parties might retain attorneys, but most commonly limited service attorneys for the purpose of formalizing their agreement and providing advice on family law. There are no grounds required for dissolution of marriage, therefore it is commonly referred to as a no-fault divorce. Only at the end of the process does the court get involved for the purpose of actually terminating the marriage; a dissolution petition is filed with the court only once the parties have reached an agreement on all the issues that must be addressed.
A divorce is an adversarial family law court proceeding, in which the parties cannot come to an amicable agreement about the end of their marriage. One party files a lawsuit against the other, asking for the court to rule on the case and decide issues like custody, the division of property and finances and other matters.
The end result of a dissolution of marriage and a divorce is the same: the marriage is terminated.
A mediator facilitates the dissolution through supporting parties in reaching all the relevant agreements that need to be reached prior to filing their dissolution of marriage. Through the divorce process a mediator’s efforts are the same, to support parties in reaching amicable agreements and, in the case of divorce, the goal is furthermore to keep the case from having to be tried in court, which would put the final decision out of their hands and in the hands of a judge.
3. Post Decree Mediation
Post decree mediation refers to mediation that takes place any time after the divorce or dissolution has been finalized. As the realities of life unfold it is common that agreements need to be revisited and adjusted. Sometimes there are changes in work schedules, a new relationship, relocation, changes in the children, or just general parenting decisions that need to be revisited in mediation so amicable agreements and solutions can be reached. Under this umbrella, a mediator can be extremely supportive in facilitating annual co-parenting meetings.